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Parents called me annoying and repugnant, said there is no future in my life and that they don’t want to see me again. They added that I’m all pretend without any element of truthfulness within me. I know they’re right, I agree with all of their points. Good luck to whomever reads this.

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worthless pig

The entire day I was shouted at and insulted again by my mother and just now reminded by her of what a worthless piece of shit I am. She called me an unhonorable, worthless pig and a waste of resources among others. She’s right, of course. She continued that it’s no wonder that sich a loser like me was left alone. That’s true as well.
Of course father also said that everything would have been so much better if I had chosen a career in the army and that I shoild sign up now.

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Dandelions

People say that when blowing the fruits of a dandelion away you should make a wish. Burning the fruits like here is ironic to me. It shows how all of my wishes and prayers dissipated into smoke.

Burning a dandelion, found on tumblr: http://url.cn/MU2anX

Praying, wishing, hoping and waiting are completely useless. It’s not like any of these would change anything. Just like redemption, those are things that don’t exist.

People say that when blowing the fruits of a dandelion away you should make a wish. Burning the fruits like here is ironic to me. It shows how all of my wishes and prayers dissipated into smoke.

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How worthless family and friends are

Two days ago, on August 27th, 2013, I wrote: “Friendship, I learned, is worthless. 我体会到了,友谊无价值。”

People spilled out private talks, they say they’ll be there when you need them, but they’re not. They’re constantly asking you for favors and they disappear when you need them the most.

Shortly after, I expanded the thought, so, today, August 30th, 2013 I decided that “If Friendship is useless, then family ties might be as well. In the end, I’m alone, til the end. I’m such a loser. 如果有意无用,家庭关系也可无用。终于我再是一个人——永远地。我是大屌丝。”

It’s all useless, it’s all worthless. There’s  no one that is important.

I was almost hit by a car the other day, it was driving to fast. God, I wish it would have hit me.

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On improvement

I was hoping for things to improve, but that was just me. Optimism, I should forget optimism, things only get worse when I’m optimistic. Things don’t improve, garbage, not for you anyway. Stay where you are, below the bottom of it all.

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Apology

To all of those that I had the opportunity to meet I would like to address my gratitude and gratefulness for your kindness and patience with me. I wish and pray that all of you will find lasting happiness, imperishable love and unending success in your lives and in that of your loved ones. I am sorry for the pain that I have caused you all.

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Happy Birthday

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